A Selective Guide: Grammy Parties 2015
You’d think that by now I’d have this Grammy thing down. I went to the Grammys for the first time in 1989, the year that Jethro Tull beat Metallica in the Best Metal/Hard Rock category, and if I can hang on to that resentment for more than 25 years, I should be able to figure out how to carry my cell, my make up, my keys, and my resume in an evening bag. I should also know which parties to hit, but alas, I’m stumped. Too many invitations, too little time.
The Atlantic party always sucks, but if I blow it off and then find out Fitz from Fitz and the Tantrums was there, I’m going to kill myself. Conversely, the Interscope party is annually fantastic, but Fergie’s got new music on the horizon, and not only will she be in the house, I can guaran-fucking-tee that the DJ will play “My Humps” to honor her glorious Grammy past. That means I’ll have to kill myself on the spot, which would mean I’d miss out on the Beats by Dre Party, which would mean if I hadn’t already killed myself I’d have to kill myself again. The Beats party is gonna be off the hook. Word is that a) Guy Oseary will be there and b) every gift bag will include 3,000 physical copies of the new U2 album.
To complicate the difficulty of choosing where to go, there are dozens of newly minted Presented-By parties to consider. If the Super Bowl blow-outs are any indication of the fun to be had, I’ve got some careful choosing to do. Even though I was invited, I didn’t go to Phoenix, and it was a huge mistake. I missed the Hennessy Lounge event with Ryan Cabrera, the Sirius XM bash with Jenny McCarthy, Pitbull, and Mark Wahlberg, Ludacris’ celebration of bold moments with Tabasco at the MAXIM party, and Magic! at the Direct TV bash at the Pendergrast Family Farm. But, if there’s only time to get to one Presented-By party on Sunday night, at least I know where I’m going to go: Bud Light. If I play my cards right, I might get introduced to whoever came up with the gold-medal idea to call their Super Bowl soiree “The Bud Light House of Something,” and I’m not carrying my resume around for nothing, you know.
There are a few parties that I’ll pass on without having to give it much thought. For example, I won’t make it to RCA, because it’s not logistically possible, and because I wasn’t invited. No big deal, though: the only reason I wanted to be there was to see my good friend Dave Grohl, and I’m pretty sure I’ll run into him elsewhere. It’s a time-honored tradition for Grammy performers to show up to support the artists they jam with on the telecast, so chances are good that
I’ll see him if I get to a party for Tony Bennett, Lady Gaga, Hozier, Annie Lennox, Jessie J, Tom Jones, Adam Levine, Gwen Stefani, AC/DC, Eric Church, Common, John Legend, Ariana Grande, Miranda Lambert, Ed Sheeran, Sam Smith, Usher, or Pharrell.
There’s only one party that’s a must for me: Epic. It’s true that I’m sentimental, and have an abiding need to live in the past, but I’ve been around long enough to know that the best parties are hosted by the labels with the most to celebrate, and — shout out to LA Reid! — Meghan Trainor’s going to have a big, big night.
See you Sunday!